Episode 21: Welcome back to the Coaching Closet, I'm your host Richele Batt. We are here again with my friend, Rex Romander. Rex has been with us before, he's a coach and a dating coach. Today we are going to be talking about dating and what plans you may have for your life, and we are excited to announce our collaboration to do a group coaching class for you in January.
Ready to hear more? Let's go...
• When I went through my divorce, where I really found this part was, you're so used to spending that time together as a family, and then you no longer have that, and that's where you really get that feeling of missing that family feeling during the holidays. And so your first few holidays are... Especially for me, especially when I didn't have my kids. It's really hard for me, but it was a hard adjustment. And the older you get and the longer you do it, the more you realize, it's just okay, it's just... It's a day that's created, but it doesn't have to dictate what day you get to spend with your kids. If I don't have a Christmas morning with my kids, most people, they really struggle with this the first time. And at the end of the day, it's just a day that's created for you to get to spend time with your kids, so... Christmas might have to be on the 27th this year. Right? That's okay. It's not about actually being on the 25th, it's about the time you get to have with your kids. (3:17)
• A same thing like when I got done with my divorce, when you're a parent, you are like your whole life revolves around your kids and family. The person you actually developed the least amount of time for is yourself. And so when I became single for the first time, it was one of those moments of like, man, like what do I do? Well, I have no idea what to do with my time and for myself, and it was actually the greatest thing that ever happened to me, as far as really getting out to get to know myself, not just What are my hobbies? What's my favorite color? Whatever... it was more about, who am I as a person, and what were some things that I could have done better that I didn't, that I need to improve on? And need to work on. So it really gives you time to do, not just find your interest and hobbies and what you like, but truly find out who am I. (5:02)
• They are where they are, but they're remaining where they were, or they won't go on from where they were, they keep reminiscing and keep bringing it up and it's just... You could tell that they're stuck on it. It's a place in limbo where they're so maybe bitter or angry or hurt or heartbroken, and they're just stuck there in this place of limbo because they're not going forward, they're not going back, or they're just stuck there. It is such an ugly place to be, and eventually you have to hit a point again. (9:54)
• That's kind of our starting point. We want to really try to help people that are looking to get a new start on the new year, it maybe they've been stuck in limbo and they're tired of it, and they hit a point... Now, I remember I was working with a woman, she was kind of talking to me, and you could tell by the way she was talking to me that she really wasn't ready for change, she really just wanted somebody to listen. I kind of told her that I said, I'll be honest with you, I don't feel like you're ready. Because people that are ready, they're done, they are so sick and tired of where they are or hurting or being sad, they're done, they want it to end, and that's when they're ready for a change, they just want so bad to be out of that. And that's really when people want to make that, truly make that change to start being happy again, to start seeing that there's other things out there and learning to love themselves and be happy being alone. (16:00)
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